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“Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars.”- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts

If you are second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?

In life, you are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimist’s route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.

So why nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now?

Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.

On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teenager’s disorder’ as well.

Here’s how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:

Optimists expect the best.

The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe in bad events only, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do.

The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune—it’s the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.

Optimists tend to focus and plan for the ‘problem’ at hand. They use ‘positive re-interpretation.’ In other words, they will most likely re-interpret a negative experience in a way that will help them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situations, they perceive them as a challenge and try harder.

They won’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.”

Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.

People respond positively to optimists.

Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.

Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.

In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.

When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher.

Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.

They persevere. They just don’t give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.

Optimists are healthier and live longer.

Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body’s ability to fight disease.

Optimists’ health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.

So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.

Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don’t just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?

Have a think about your past – are there any issues that you remember immediately, and recoil at the memory in the same instance? These are the experiences you need to focus on. To truly move on in life, you need to learn and accept your past – be it an embarrassing moment or something far more sinister.

To begin, write down the experience in full. If it is something embarrassing or you’re ashamed of it, don’t worry, only you will ever see it. Write down exactly what happened, why it effected you so badly and what kind of effect it still has on today. Instead of recoiling and dismissing the thought, spend a good half an hour actually thinking about it – for some, this is the first time in decades that they’ve really relived in the memory in full, and the process can be liberating. However, it can also be upsetting, so try and bear in mind that you’re doing this for the greater good.

With the entire incident written down, send it to yourself in the post. When it arrives, open it and read it again. As this is happening on a fresh day, it allows time for perspective and sense to come through and you should feel slightly differently to how you did at the time of writing.

At this point, if there’s something you can do to rectify the past, do it. It may be contacting someone you had a fight with or apologising for past behaviours, it could even be something extreme like going to the police. If you can do something, then do try and do it, for only until the issue is resolved can you really move on. Force through the awkwardness, telling yourself that at the end of the road a calmer, happier you await. After all, a short period of unpleasantness is infinitely preferable to more years of misery at a certain memory.

With this done – or if it wasn’t something you could rectify – then complete the exercise by destroying the written text. Fire, as long as it is done safely, is most people’s preference for this, as you can watch your past burn away slowly rather than a sudden and almost violent action like tearing it apart. Watch the past smoulder and try to finally release all that negative energy surrounding it.

You may need to repeat this process several times, and in fact it may even be best if you do. But by confronting an uncomfortable past, you are opening doors for a more pleasant future. Good luck.

It is often assume that only wholesale changes apply to getting out of a rut, such as leaving a bad relationship or getting a new job. The truth is much more trivial than that, and those in jobs they like and marriages which are loving can still feel worn down by the repetitive nature of their lives.

One of the biggest causes of repetition is traditional, that one thing that tells you time and time again to repeat the same actions. And all just because you’ve done it before. Every Christmas, for example, you find yourself eating the same food, with the same people and getting bored singing the same songs. It might be ‘tradition’, but unless you enjoy that tradition, it’s utterly pointless. This applies to everything where tradition exists; unless you still actively enjoy the activity and would do it even if it weren’t tradition, stop doing it!

Changes in even smaller phases like that can rejuvenate the mind. To begin, go for those things that really seem pointless – such as watching a different genre of film from your usual, changing your IP provider or buying a different newspaper. You might not like the experiment, but even small differences can help stop you from feeling like you’re just living Groundhog Day.

For the ultimate feeling of breaking the pattern, do something that you’ve never had the courage to do before. Maybe you’re always wanted to try skydiving but have been too scared, or you’ve had a crush on someone in your office but have never had the courage to say something. In these instances, simply ask yourself “what’s the worst that can happen?”. By running through the worst case scenario, you’ll find it loses it’s fear. This type of thought processing is known as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and is widely accepted by psychologists across the world as genuinely having the power to change lives. By facing your fears and doing something completely different, you’ll unleash a feeling of new energy unlike anything you’ve ever felt before.

One of the biggest problems people have with their bodies is their weight. This can range from feeling too big or too thin, to just not liking their shape. By deciding to finally do something about whatever it is that bothers you, you’ll almost feel better immediately.

If you need to lose weight, then join a healthy eating plan. Note the non-use of the word “diet”. Learn to eat well, regularly and allow yourself the occasional treat. If it helps, consult a dietician for advice. It is always best to seek someone calling themselves a “dietician” and not a “nutritionist” – dietician is a protected term (such as Doctor) whereas anyone can call themselves a nutritionist. The truth remains that simple methods are the most effective, so while the latest diet craze may be supposedly having wildly spectacular results for others, in the long term a plan of sensible eating will work the best.

Even if you’re happy with your weight, exercise is hugely beneficial and should be encouraged for all. Exercise produces endorphins, known as the feel good hormone, and many find their natural disposition is greatly improved by regular exercise. Self improvement is all about feeling better, after all.

You don’t have to go the gym to exercise; literally anything that increases heart rate is classed as aerobic exercise and is therefore encouraging the body to produce endorphins. Of all the hundreds of ways to increase your heart rate, there is going to be something you enjoy. Once you’ve found it, the benefits are two fold – you enjoy the activity, while getting the resultant buzz from the endorphins and keeping fit, too.

Very few physical problems are utterly insoluble. If you really think fixing a body issue will make you happier and improve your life, then there is no reason – nor any social stigma – that should discourage you from doing it.